Three Months:)

My boyfriend is very kind to me. He cooks for me, he speaks to my heart when I am sad  and brings me on great dates.

Some of my favorite dates were things like the aquarium, looking at pet stores and going to an arcade. We have won unicorn flags and toy dinosaurs. We have hiked to waterfalls and played with baby turtles. We make pies and go grocery shopping.

He is great. He lets me be myself and I never have to worry about him getting mad at me. We are an amazing match and I think we keep each other on our toes. 

Every Sunday we have dinner with his parents and today is our 3 month anniversary so we celebrated last night. 

We had an indoor picnic. First we moved some furniture and spread out a Utes blanket. He brought out a picnic-like basket and set two wine glasses on top. The lights were off and the glow of the Christmas tree was behind him....we had two cinnamon candles so we could see each other. We drank our sparkling white grape juice and ate our hot dogs and cheeto puffs. 

(Another thing I like about him, he goes along with whatever I'm in the mood for...including hot dogs and cheetos for a romantic dinner)

After we ate and drank we exchanged gifts. He gave me the flower nose rings that I've had my eye on for awhile. It was the most romantic date I've ever been on:)

I have the best boyfriend ever. Here's to another three months!

I don't know.

Those three words have helped me out a lot.

Ever since I moved out, I've been struggling. Emotionally. As previously mentioned, I have depression. It's not that I'm super sad, it is just being overwhelmed with emotion. My doctor explained it to me by letting me know that normal bodies regularly produce seratonin. I don't know how to spell it but that is what makes you feel emotions. My body produces way too much and overloads me with emotion. For no reason. So I'm on some pills that regulate my seratonin intake.

Going on...I'm emotionally exhausted. I'm taking my pills but I'm a woman, so I am still very emotional. I cry way too much, especially when I have to talk about my feelings. I'm dating a man who is very good for me and has me express myself instead of stuffing everything inside. I appreciate him greatly.

As hard as it is, I'm glad that I'm learning to share my emotions.

Going along with the blog title, I thought I should share what I've learned. Being on my own is a lot harder than I thought. It's not that I didn't think for myself when I was living with my parents, but I have to think through everything alone now. I don't have anything planned out for me, everything is my decision.

I don't always make the best decisions but I'm trying. I actually like myself for the first time in a very long time so I'd like to think I'm doing alright.

There are some things I have not decided yet. And when people ask me about those things, I've learned that I'm allowed to say, "I don't know."

It's okay to not know everything...and it's okay to be me.